I had the privilege of overhearing these "gemstone conversations" at work this week:
1. Girls at Work: "Yes, my sister had her baby this weekend. They're planning to have another one in 2010 because they've had one in 2008 and 2009. Isn't that funny?"
In My Head: Ummm, Ha. Ha. I can't believe people (i.e. bunny rabbits) actually plan this baby thing like planning a vacation or buying a new car and that it actually comes to fruition.
Cannot identify on any level.
2. Girl at Work (who incidentally happens to be aware of my situation): "My husband and I are going to try and start getting pregnant this year. I'm telling you, I don't dread labor and delivery - I dread that first 3 months of pregnancy. I just don't even know how I'll make it through all the morning sickness that my mother had."
In My Head: Ummm, excuse me while I throw up at the grotesque superficiality and naivity of this little gemstone of a comment. This statement is from a girl who is totally aware that I am begging my doctor to allow me to inject my belly with a hormonal cocktail. Need I say more?
Again, cannot identify on any level.
It's amazing how IF has changed my perspective. I suppose these are things I would have laughed at or commented on three years ago. Now, I just shake my head and get the hell out of the room as quickly as possible.
And, if I hear one more thing about the octuplets...
Damn good thing therapy is scheduled for Thursday.
12 comments:
I hear you completely on all three, Leslie. I'm beginning to feel like I can't relate to anyone who isn't infertile (good thing i just joined a support group!)
mo
I hear you on the octuplets. Yuck.
Glad you have an appt. Thursday. It's just too much. Hugs.
Ack. I hate overheard conversations.
Some people, no? Hang in there.
I was stuck for an hour in the hairdressers on Saturday first treated to the woman to my left banging on about her pregnancy, nursery, due date etc then just as she left a guy to my right announced that his girlfriend was pregnant and "they were amazed at how quick it was". I might wear ear plugs on a permanent basis ...
One of my fertile friends has been pregnant in 04, had the baby in 05. Pregnant in 06, had the baby in 06 (this one didn't make it). Pregnant in 07, had the baby in 08. Now she's asking her husband for another one - on FB! Sometimes I just shake my head and wonder what it would like to be that fertile, where you don't have to plan your entire life around TTC.
Good luck Thursday! I think the apt is going to be great.
~~HUGS~~
I really couldn't stand to hear glib comments about family planning before any of the IF hit, and now it's intolerable for sure.
I am always amazed by the conversations I overhear. People are so sympathetic to our IF situation, but I really don't think they understand that it is devestating to us. They don't realize that it actually becomes a way of life. They don't understand how completely blessed they are to be able to have sex just a few times and..... BOOM ...they made a baby!
As for the octuplets.... I have been in complete shock over all of that. 1 woman + 6 pregnancies + 14 children = a very irresponsible fertility doctor!!!
Good luck at the therapist tomorrow. It will be good to just let it all out and maybe he/she will have some wonderful advise for you! Still praying!!!
Conversatinos like these drive me nuts. What's ironic is I used to make similar remarks myself. "I think we want to have two or four kids" or "I'd like my kids spaced this many years apart" or "I plan to have had at least one child before I turn thirty." I wasn't a bad person then, just completely ignorant and naive. In one way I am jealous of people who say things like what you posted. But in another way I feel sorry for them too.
Thinking of you. I found your blog through a few others I read. My husband and I have tried 2 rounds of Invitro. Both were unsuccessful! We are gearing up to try our frozen embryos in the next few months and praying that it will result in a BFP! Infertility is such a hard road to travel. I know all to well...Still travelling- hoping to reach the end soon!
Stupid insensitive people!
It's mad how much people take for granted. But you know what? I was one of those people before we started ttc. I really thought you just have unprotected sex and you make a baby. As easy as that. How naive was i?
Post a Comment